Can Christian Merry Again After Partner Die

x Reasons for Widowed Seniors to Marry Once again

  • joemckeever.com
  • 2018 12 Apr
10 Reasons for Widowed Seniors to Marry Again

"Two are improve than one because they accept a good return for their labor. For if either falls, the other will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when no 1 is there to lift him up… And if two lie downward together, they keep warm. Simply how can one be warm alone?" (Ecclesiastes iv:ix-eleven)

Bertha and I accept been married fifteen months. We love this fourth dimension of our lives so much–we were each wed for 52 years before the Lord took Gary and Margaret–we wish all our friends could share the joy!

I knew a few months later on my wife died that information technology would be God'due south will for me to remarry. How does i know? The aforementioned fashion he knows anything else is from the Lord: in your spirit. The knowledge is only at that place. However, in the case of my wife Bertha–she and I married in January of 2017–her beginning two years of widowhood she spent grieving Gary'south death. In her journal on the first anniversary of his passing, she wrote, "Oh Lord, how will I ever survive another year without Gary?" Only before that yr had passed, nosotros had met. We both knew the outset week nosotros met that God had put usa together.

It's necessary to signal out that Bertha loved Gary and I loved Margaret. And they each still hold honored places in our hearts. Nothing nigh that has changed. What has changed is that God has joined us together as "the honey of the residuum of our lives." And information technology's wonderful.

Here are 10 reasons Bertha and I have thought of why the widowed should consider remarrying…

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1. You have more living to do.

ane. You lot have more living to practice.

Remarrying is 1 manner of affirming your faith in the rest of your life. "I believe in tomorrow!"

Age has nothing to do with information technology.

When I knew the Lord wanted me to remarry, I began praying, "Lord, please send me the dearest of the residuum of my life." (To call the 2d spouse the honey of my life would feel similar a expose to the love person I spent over half a century with!)

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2. You're not ready for the grave.

2. You're not set for the grave.

You're set up for something new in your life. And new/unlike it will be, that's for certain, when you remarry. You volition each bring new friends and family into the other's life.

A few days after we married, nosotros went on a long trip. Offset, nosotros visited Atlanta where I spoke at the retirement of a friend of 55 years. The side by side morning, we had breakfast with a couple who had been best friends of Margaret and me. So, nosotros traveled on to Savannah for a few nights of honeymoon in a lovely old B&B. From there we drove up to South Carolina to see onetime friends, and so on to North Carolina to see my son's family. And from there, back to Alabama to run across my siblings. And abode. (By the style, I rented a new Cadillac for the trip. And loved driving information technology!)

A few months later, we drove to Florida to see Bertha's family, stopping along the way to run across old friends. Soon, nosotros'll host her family as they come for a granddaughter's college graduation, then a calendar month later, drive to Florida for a grandson'south high schoolhouse graduation. I love information technology.

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3. You have much to share.

3. Y'all take much to share.

You and your new spouse volition have a lifetime of stories and experiences to share with the other. You'll never run out of things to talk about, experiences to share, and interests.

Bertha and Gary served churches in several Southern states and in New England, then served every bit missionaries in Malawi and Brazil. Margaret and I served churches in the S and then spent over a quarter century in New Orleans pastoring and leading the association. And so, Bertha and I have a world of stories saved up to share. We each delight in hearing these tales.

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4. You need some laughter in your life.

four. You need some laughter in your life.

A few weeks afterwards Bertha and I met, her daughter Lari, a schoolteacher in central Florida, texted me to say, "Give thanks you for giving my mother her laughter back."

I read where someone said, "If there is no laughter in your lovemaking, you're doing it all wrong." I like that.

As Scripture says, "A cheerful middle is skilful medicine, but a crushed spirit dries upward the bones." (Proverbs 17:22)

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5. You need a best friend in every sense of the word.

five. You need a best friend in every sense of the word.

Bertha and I are quick to say our marriage is more than (ahem) companionship. We are in love, and we like that. But to say, every bit many take, that seniors marry for companionship just is to insult them. Who knows love improve than those who were married for twoscore or 50 years? And who would be better at showing information technology than one who was well-married during that time?

A best friend is at that place for you, works to understand y'all, and is quick to do those things that please you lot. The other day, as I was finishing my circular of errands–to the bank, the cleaners, the library, etc.–on the manner dwelling I stopped at Kroger's and bought two things for Bertha: an arrangement of majestic tulips and a box of Raisin Bran Crunch, her favorite. I came in the firm displaying them like I was presenting the Hope diamond. She beamed with pleasure.

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6. You need another point of view.

6. You need another point of view.

Everyone needs someone who can disagree with us and still be on our squad.

After Margaret died, I would sometimes call a friend and ask them to listen to the article I'd written for my blog that 24-hour interval and "tell me what you retrieve." My married woman of 52 years would practice this–sometimes with the bark off!–and I missed it terribly after the Lord took her. These days, I enquire Bertha to exist my sounding board.

Without another's perspective, we may start to believe that we are right nigh everything. And my friends, sometimes we are certainly incorrect.

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7. Married people help each other stay safe.

7. Married people aid each other stay safe.

After I was widowed, it occurred to me 1 24-hour interval that if something happened to me at dwelling house it could be days before one of my children chosen to check. Not long afterwards nosotros married, I came home to detect that Bertha had fallen from the ladder where she was hanging pictures in the living room. We spent hours in the emergency room that day, and together we agreed to stay off ladders, or at least never to climb one when the other is non around.

When I'g bankroll out of a crowded parking space, even though the backup camera helps, I enlist Bertha'due south assistance. "Yes!" she calls if the lane is clear in her management. Or, "No!" You may exist able to tell we had a discussion on the best affair to say when communicating to me. Make it clear, I said to her. And forceful. The thought is to help each other stay safe.

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8. Married people help each other stay healthy.

8. Married people help each other stay healthy.

We eat amend together than when we lived alone. The temptation to have another basin of water ice foam is just too powerful when no one else knows or cares. Bertha eats lots more strawberries and blueberries than she ever did, for the unproblematic reason that I have them every morning of my life with my Honeynut Cheerios.

Nosotros walk the one mile path in the park every bit many afternoons each week as we tin can. We hold easily and talk nonstop. Sometimes, if one of us is feeling lazy or unmotivated, the other will say, "Come up on. Delight? Walk with me." And then, we're helping each other.

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9. You will have someone to talk with, someone who will listen to you.

9. You will accept someone to talk with, someone who will listen to you.

Later on the Lord took Margaret, there were times I would come up out of a church where I'd preached and arrive the automobile, so reach for the phone to phone call her with a report on how things had gone. I knew she had been praying. And so information technology would hitting me: She's no longer at dwelling house. And I would weep.

Now, Bertha goes with me, and nosotros talk nonstop. We talk while traveling in the motorcar, we talk while walking in the park, and lots of other times.

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10. How to say this... It's great to be in love again!

10. How to say this... Information technology'southward great to be in love once again!

Earlier we met, a friend said, "Seniors do not marry for love. They marry for companionship." I said, "Not me. If I e'er ally again, it will be for dearest."

And and so it is.

Practice I demand to elaborate on how wonderful this woman is? She is far more than I could ever accept asked for or expected.

A few months after we married, I accompanied Bertha to her high school reunion. Nosotros had not gotten out of the car before a classmate of hers (Woods Colina High School, Jackson, MS, class of '58) told me how blessed I was to have Bertha. I turned to her and said, "I'll make you a bargain. I'll requite y'all a nickel today for every time someone tells me how lucky I am." 2 hours afterwards, I handed her a twenty-dollar bill and said, "Let'south only call it fifty-fifty!"

So, so blessed.

Joe McKeever has been a disciple of Jesus Christ more than 65 years, been preaching the gospel more than 55 years, and has been writing and cartooning for Christian publications more than 45 years. He blogs at www.joemckeever.com.

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